“I have worked hard, I’ve stayed focused and I’ve been blessed,” a woman told me recently. “But my family is jealous. They make comments about how much easier my life is because I finished college and I have a good position with a great company. I used to feel guilty. I didn’t want to share good news because I felt like I was bragging.”
My heart hurt for her as she shared her experience. She’s happy, but careful not to show it, always pointing out the hard parts of her life to justify the good parts. Maybe you can relate. Unfortunately, not everyone will be happy for your success. It isn’t a reflection of you, but of them. Not everyone can celebrate others. When you live in a place of fear and regret, another’s success or happiness can remind you of where you might be had you made a different set of choices. It is a place of scarcity that believes that when your sister, co-worker or neighbor makes stride, it somehow sets you back. The truth is when another succeeds, we can find hope in their wins if we choose to. The happiness of another can be a reminder of God’s goodness and grace. And it can be contagious if you don’t inoculate yourself to the joy of genuinely wishing another well.
It hurts when those you love don’t celebrate with you. But when you work hard to improve your life and find your joy, don’t let anybody make you feel guilty about your success and happiness. You don’t have to prove your right to be happy. Be intentional about finding and nurturing relationships where you are celebrated. Rather than being angry for those in your life who don’t fit into that category, pray for them.
My challenge to you this week:
Let go of any guilt about your success or happiness.
Journal about it:
When do you find yourself downplaying your happiness or good news? Who in your life genuinely celebrates you? What could you do to further nurture that relationship? Who do you need to pray for in this area?
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