In what situation in your life do you need an answer to a dilemma, but don’t quite know what the answer is?

Perhaps there’s a step you need to take or a conversation you need to have, but you’re stuck. Perhaps you don’t have the confidence to do it or you just don’t feel strong in that area. I invite you to try a really simple coaching technique I’ve used for myself, as I‘ve coached others, and as I’ve trained other coaches.

You see, sometimes we need to step outside of ourselves. We need to see things from the perspective of someone who has a solid answer – someone who is confident. Someone that we admire and respect.

Do you have somebody in mind? Perhaps it’s that really wise friend, or that aunt or uncle, or a colleague of yours. Maybe it’s someone you don’t even know personally, but you’ve watched them from afar and you love how they handle things. They just seem to always know what to do and what to say. Have someone in mind?

It can be powerful to imagine such a person in the situation in which you currently find yourself and then ask yourself this:

How would my wise friend handle this situation?

My wise friend is Yvette. I share her powerful story in the chapter on how to “Flip the Script” in my book Successful Women Speak Differently, and readers always mention how her story impacted them. It doesn’t surprise me at all. I think Yvette can do just about anything, and sometimes when I get stuck and I’m wondering how to handle a situation or what to say, I think to myself, “How would Yvette handle this?” Sometimes I just call her and ask.

Here’s what it does for you to ponder this question about someone wise in your life. Sometimes we just need a role model, someone who is strong and confident with whom we connect – someone we can look at and say, “If she can do it, I can do it too. I may have butterflies, but it’s possible to address this situation in a better way. Just because I don’t feel confident doesn’t mean that I can’t do what I need to do and say what I need to say.” It can give us strength to picture ourselves doing something in a similar way as someone we admire and respect – not because we want to imitate them, but because we can all use a little inspiration at times, and a reminder of what’s possible when we are confident and wise.