One of the most common questions I get from those looking to advance their career or business is, “How do I find a mentor?” We’re all looking for someone who’s been there, done that to walk with us along our path, steady us when we stumble, and offer a wise voice of experience in times of uncertainty. But often when a person of experience and substance is standing right in front of them, people don’t know the right questions to ask. A person you deem a role model or mentor often won’t have a program laid out for you to follow. However many are willing to answer questions and share lessons from their own life experiences if you will just know what to ask when the opportunity presents itself.
Mentorship is often an informal relationship, so you learn to glean information in a casual, confident way by asking insightful questions that can shorten your learning curve on the way to your goals. Here are a few questions to ask when you have the opportunity to converse with someone whose experience could prove invaluable to you. Intuitively choose which questions to ask and when. Then create a few questions of your own. If your mentor of choice were sitting with you right now, what would you want to know?
- What is the best decision you ever made?
Often, at a pivotal moment, successful people make decisions that might go under the radar as the ‘best’ decision. Once you ask, you’ll see how good decisions can impact the course of your life for years to come.
- What’s the worst decision you ever made?
Listen carefully to the answer so you can avoid making the same mistake. Ask why it was the worst decision and what they would do differently if they had known better.
- If there was one thing you wish you’d known when you started, what would it be?
Talk about a question that can shorten your learning curve quickly. Hindsight is always 20/20, right? Make a mentor’s hindsight your foresight.
- When you face a setback or disappointment, what do you do?
Successful people are often those who can see the good even when things go badly. Those who succeed are usually those most willing to take risks, and risk takers are comfortable with failure as a part of the journey to success. A Japanese proverb says, “Fall seven times. Stand up eight.” Find out what your mentor does from a mental and emotional standpoint to keep getting back up.
- What is the wisest step you think I could take in my career right now?
Given your current strengths and weaknesses, threats and opportunities, what is the best piece of advice this mentor could offer you right now? After you’ve gleaned lessons from their life, you might already guess what advice they’d give you. But to be certain, ask. Be open to constructive criticism and feedback. Don’t fight it. Embrace it.
